and


drinking alone...?

I miss us emoing + Heneikken..~

Do you know how sad i am...?
Do you know how much it hurts...?
Do you really know...?

I tried so hard, really hard not to think...
I really can't believe this is happening to me...
Sometimes i really want to cry out loud, but nobody's there...

I sat there, thinking and thinking...

thinking about the lil imperfect things that makes life perfect..

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She wished all her memories were of the good times but the bad times kept coming back to haunt her. And nobody told them that this friendship was a short one. There were her happy days, when she would walk around in a daydream with nothing but a smile on her face, catching herself giggling as she walked down the street when a joke of their friendship would suddenly pop in her head. Then she would fall into days of deep dark depression; then finally build up the strength to be positive and to snap out of it for another few days. But the tiniest and simplest thing would trigger off her tears again. That was her routine. It was a tiring process and most of the time she couldnt be bothered battling with her mind. It was far stronger than her body.
Friends sometimes help her with her tears, other times making her laugh. But even in her laughter there was something missing. she never seemed to be truly happy, she just seemed to be passing the time waiting for something else. She was tired of just existing, she wanted to live. But what was the point of living when there was no life in it. These questions went through her mind over and over again till she reached the point of not wanting to wake up from her dreams that felt so real. Deep down, she knew it was normal to feel like this. She didn't particularly think she was losing her mind. She knew that people said that one day she would be happy again and that this feeling would just be a distant memory. It was letting go that was the hard part......=(

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